The same distinction—whether we are imposing a burden on others or giving them an opportunity to fulfill a mitzvah—can be applied to our dealings with our children. If a parent sees that his [adult] children enjoy and actually want to serve him in order to fulfill their mitzvah, then he should instruct them to serve him. But if he senses that it is a burden on them because they do not desire the mitzvah, and even if they do, they do so only because they are embarrassed to refuse the parent’s wishes and they are doing it grudgingly, then the parent should not trouble and burden them. He should serve himself. And especially when the members of the house are asleep, it is proper to compassion on them and not wake them. He should attend to his own need and should even take care of their needs. For it is a mitzvah to do chessed-kindness with all people—including one’s children and household help. It all depends on the situation and the nature of the people in the house. If the activity is a burden for them but not for him, then it is better that he trouble himself rather than be a burden on them. Let him honor Hashem for having graced him with agile feet and energetic spirit by doing chessed with all people.
י״ד במרחשון ה׳תשפ״א
My brother and my nation, take this Torah book, in this and like this learn well, listen and revival your soul, you will achieve joy and joy, in this world and next world. (from introduction of the author) 1