Regarding the giving of charity Chazal set out very clear rules. They said that “Your own life takes precedence”, that “your own poor people take precedence”, and that the poor people of your own town take precedence”. It follows that a person should not be very parsimonious regarding the expenses of his own household in order to have money to give to charity unless he has the agreement of the people of the household, as the members of his household take precedence.
Included in this statement that “Your own life takes precedence” is that a person should sell the real estate and portable property that he owns in order to have money to live off when he becomes old, and he should take the first portion of his property himself to send “tasty food” for himself to the next world. He should not worry so much about his children to leave them all of his wealth, as a person is his own closest relative and his own life takes precedence. If his descendants are great men amongst the land who are a generation of blessed upright people and Hashem has broadened his own capabilities, then he should surely open his hand according the blessing of Hashem that He has given to him. If, on the other hand, his abilities are diminished, his own life and that of his household members comes before anybody else. This is especially true if he has debts which he does not repay and instead he increases his donations to charity, that this will not be accepted by Hashem. In any event a person cannot free himself completely from the obligation to give charity and even a poor person whose support is from charity should give a small amount to charity every day before praying, as it says “I will see your face with charity!”.
